Dark Lights – Prologue

Yesterday was World’s Poetry Day.. a day marked by UNESCO to commemorate all those minds who chose to be something out of the box, the ones who chose to speak; not merely by talking! The poet inside me wanted to write about yesterday and it’s significance in our lives but instead I choose to address what my heavy heart wants to convey.

Today morning I lost a friend. A friend who was the first one to teach me about the phenomenon known as True Love.

It was a friendship of eleven years and 3 months! We grew up together. She noticed me grow six feet tall and always made sure I was happy. We seldom spoke but we both knew when we needed each other. We always stayed inside our boundaries, never crossed them. Never regretted it till today. Her eyes sparkled with joy everytime she saw me and though we were a few years apart; she matured way before I did. I still remember the time that we both got scolded for playing in the afternoon and she quietly accepted her fault when my mother scolded us! She knew and understood that my mother was angry while I stood there ready to quarrel with my mother. She loved mother. Respected her from the very beginning. It was maybe because of the fact that my mother took care of her from the very first day she started breathing.

Eleven years have passed us by, yet when I saw her today, lying still with a strange calmness in her eyes.. I could see the flashbacks of our first meeting vividly! It was really surreal. She was beautiful in her own way. Some found her to be too skinny, others found her to be dirty and smelly. To me, her smell never bothered because to her my smell (bad or pleasant ) meant alot! My love for her started from those lonely afternoons where we’d sit on our balcony and leisurely wait for time to pass us by. Oh! It felt like we had all the time in the world. If only I could steal a few more hours, a few more minutes, days or a couple years to spend with her.

I am guilty. Guilty of refocusing my love to others with time. She stood where we were, I slowly got detached. Soon, sixteen pairs of paws strolled inside my house and she became distant. She had a sister who was always a bully. I still remember their eyes the day they saw that we had bought four of their kins and they walked right inside the house, the sacred place they only had the opportunity to enter a few times during those ghastly Diwali nights!

Her name was Sadhu; as in a Saint. An odd name but she loved it. Honoured it with a swift wag of her tail everytime she heard it.

She didn’t know our language but she spoke to me yesterday, through those eyes.. she seemed to say ‘I’ve had a great life. Thanks to you. Now let me sleep. I’m tired’

She’s gone now, due to multiple organ failure and I feel ashamed of every minute that I wasted elsewhere satiating my own needs and unnecessary wants rather than being with her. I may seem overly romantic and mushy but I actually saw a look in her eyes sometimes which just asked a simple question ‘Why do you shrug us off when you’re busy when all we do is greet you in the best way we can whenever your smell enters our nostrils and our black and white eyes recognise you from a distance?’

Do I have an answer? No! But I wish I did. I wish I could go back and be with her but I can’t. I wish I could tell humans to stop mistreating dogs just because its amusing to them. I wish I could kill all those who hurt them. I wish I could explain to them that a dog is a dog; whether they stay inside a mansion of a house or on the streets. They love us in spite of every flaw that we possess. Let’s just love them for everything they do without expecting anything in return.

Rest in peace love. I’ll see you when my time comes. This time when I see those eyes asking me that haunting question, I wish I will have an answer that would satisfy you! Thank you for everything you did for me and the millions of memories you gave me. Love you Sadhu!

This was the Prologue to my story, ‘Dark Lights’.

Achromaticity of Life

The day arrives. Like every year, it comes and every time it is the same; for others as well as her. For others it is the festival of colours, the day everyone is drenched in myriad shades from top to bottom, barely recognizable. The day Bhang is the substitute for water and sweets are had more than staple food! The day starts with the only weapon of the day: the pichkari and it ends with an ambrosial dinner with close friends and family. It is the day where everyone, a neophyte or an elderly are all smiles about being smeared with colours.

Amidst all the plethora of colours, the paint of the house has faded. It sticks out like a sore thumb among the heavily coloured houses of the block.
The din of the outside world doesn’t reach her ears. The screams of delight and the squeaks resulting from the splash of cold water on the skin doesn’t make her look out of the window. A child passes by, sees her by the window and plots a devious little plan that his puny brain can fathom. A balloon comes out from his pocket and he takes aim. Splash! the gulaal – filled balloon strikes right below the open window and the red colour makes a deep mark. It almosts looked like a perfect piece of abstract art had the canvas been so wrong!
She walks up to the window and sees her culprit and his crime. The kid runs away, petrified of the repercussions to his mischief.
The red spot reminds her of this day, a few years back. It was a Holi like any other, all the right vibes and the pleasant atmosphere in place. A perfect irony to what would follow. Weather has a knack for this, teasing humans by providing the perfect weather whenever there’s an impending doom nearby. He was just nineteen years old. A brilliant child, with the perfect manners and an amazing persona. The perfect kinda of son that any mother would kill for! Life’s irony at its best, the woman who had given birth to him never got to see him. Life chose to take away her power of vision but that wasn’t enough. On the day the whole world celebrates colours, she lost the one who made her feel she was never blind!

Sunday Fan Post by Drik Paul

Two years passed; no calls, no contact. The only voice that jingles in my ears, you said, “I’m not your friend that I’ve to answer all your texts.”

There was something that I always felt intriguing about you. I tried hard to find the answers in these two years but I failed most of the time. It was not a usual attraction, nor a sexual lust. It was neither your curves nor those moments. It was your very presence, the candid curve of your smile, the grace when you walk, the high falling streaks of your hairs that made me lost in you. I always thought that God has manufactured our eyes in a factory but God has crafted yours by His own hands. It was always me who ruined the moments, always me to drive you apart, always me to be the reason for your sorrow; yet you forgave me all the time. You always tried to seek the good from me when I threw my bad at you. I don’t want to ask you for an apology for all the shit that I did. I rather want to thank you for making me realize when you cried behind me. In this two years of time, I found the real Me. I paved the path that I always wanted to; all these events may not have happened if you didn’t say so two years back. I loved you then and I absolutely do so now, but the equations have changed. Love has got a new definition in my life. The affection, that I had before is still there in me, suppressed by the very truth of the reality but these days, I rather respect you more than I love you. I can understand the insecurities embedded deep inside you, the pressure of making the only life you have got to count, where you want to be recognized, the judgemental disposition from your family; all of this which resists you from loving me! I love you and I mean it! That doesn’t mean that I want you to do all the stuffs like the others who think they are in Love. Why not let us make a new trend of love? Something genuinely unique. We don’t need to get close, no need for dates, no kisses, no hugs, no intimacy. Why don’t we just enjoy each other’s presence in our hearts and feel the sweet vibes? Let the beat of our hearts synchronize and realize that no matter who in this world hates us; we love each other forever, till eternity lasts! – Drik Paul.